I Survived The Election

I’m finally recovering from the election. It’s taking me all week, but I think I’m going to survive. I’m too old for this. My hips hurt, although how that can happen just from being tense and nervous is anybody’s guess.

The fact that I’m drained - physically and emotionally - is the reason why politics is for young people. And another reason why it’s a good thing we elected Barack Obama. If I can barely survive the election process, John McCain must be exhausted. Not to mention his mom.

And what about the children? It’s gonna take more than a puppy to get the Obama girls to forgive their parents for putting them through this grueling campaign. Can you imagine the arguments over the dresses they had to wear on stage? “Why does Sasha always get to wear the prettier one? Sasha, Sasha, Sasha!”

And the Palin kids. Good grief. They sneak a couple of things onto the counter at Nieman Marcus and the whole world has a hissy fit. What kids don’t slide a candy bar, lip gloss, a $7,000 outfit into the cart once in a while? Those kids have got to be glad to be back in Wasilla, playing video games, making snow angels and knitting baby booties.

So I’m not the only one in recovery mode. First on my list is to deal with, organize, compile and file the chum. I’ve been buying anything with Obama’s name on it, anything red white and blue, or with the words “change” or “hope,” and stuffing it into my closet. I can no longer reach my actual clothes and yesterday had to wear an American flag fashioned into a skirt and a yard sign with arm holes poked out.

I’ve been thinking about what is going to replace the campaign in my life and I think I’m going to start running again. It will be a relatively easy transition, since running is much like campaigning in many ways: You have good days and bad days, but you have to keep running. You have times when your old sciatica comes back and starts acting up (Bill Ayers pops up out of the ‘60s) but you have to keep running, even if it’s slower and gimpier. Some days you are startled by barky, mean dogs not properly chained or restrained (populist Republicans) but you have to keep running. There are times when you feel no one is supporting you and those closest to you stop encouraging you (Jesse Jackson, Rev. Wright and the token black Republican strategists who got an inordinate amount of air time), but you have to keep running. And then there are times that you get into a rut and start falling back on old, sorry excuses (making speeches where you repeat a phrase and try to get the audience to chant alongside you) but you have to . . . smack yourself.

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